High Heels and Homecoming....

Okay...  so here we go!  Off to high school and having fun!  Tonight is the Homecoming Dance.  My daughters and their friends have been looking forward to going since the start of school.  The dresses, shoes, jewelry have been purchased but now....  back to our world....Where will I wear my pod??  Question number one comes up as Kalee tries on her fitted dress that doesn't leave much room for a clunky insulin filled pod stuck to your stomach.  Try lower, try higher, try more toward the hip....  is my reply, as we try desperately to find an inconspicuous spot!!!  Okay, first problem solved... we will put it closer to the hip..  Now how about the sensor which is on the stomach...  Let's try to stretch the dress a little bit in the stomach area so that sensor doesn't pop right through...  Where will I put my pdm monitor and test strips???  In your small black purse with your phone I reply.... Is the purse big enough?  We'll make it fit....  These are the little issues that have a way of putting a damper on something that is supposed to be fun and exiting....  Kalee is still wearing a big smile on her face but then realizes...  no room for the sugar tablet bottle in her purse!!  No problem, we will put tablets in a plastic baggie and squish them in there....  The smile fades a little bit.   I tell her not to allow all of this to take the fun out of her night.  In my heart I really want to say.....  don't forget to test at least once (preferably twice), lower your basal if you have more than one low.....  and call me!!!  Instead I smile, give her a hug and tell her to be wise, and have fun.  Heart wrenching for me.  I would love to be right there with Kalee making sure that she is doing everything that I have taught her over the years  but...  the reality of it is....  I am not going to be able to be over her shoulder every minute for the rest of her life.  A very tough reality for this mom to accept.  So, as my daughter heads off to her first Homecoming Dance ... I must step back and silently pray that she takes what I have taught her and makes wise decisions not only relating to her blood sugar but to life choices in general....  (It helps to know that her older sister will be there keeping an eye on things as well;)  High heels and Homecoming...  here we come!!

Kalee posing with Michael before the dance.

Macy and Kalee all ready for Homecoming...

 

Report Card Day.... A1C

Well tomorrow is our three month appointment, when I take the kids to the endocrinologist for their A1C blood test.  I can't help but to get knots in my stomach whenever this day comes.  I have always felt as if the kids A1C is a report card as to how I am doing with controlling their blood sugars.   Over the years (especially when Kalee was little) the A1C's ranged between 6.2 to 6.8... (a good range in the world of Type1 D) Michael's have remained nicely controlled for now but, as adolescence creeps up, so do the A1C's.  We have been seeing between 7.1 to 8.5 over the past year with our teenager.  I would be lying if I did not admit that these gradual increases trouble me. My heart, now, skips a beat when the phone rings with the lab results.  I mean... really, What is the matter with me??  Do I think that the Dr. is going to put a big FAIL on my forehead when the A1C's increase??   I know that logically this makes no sense at all. As much as I tell my brain to stop..  I just can't seem to... We have wonderful Dr's that have always given positive feedback regarding the labs yet...  I tend to want to beat myself up over the increases that come along with growth spurts and hormones...  I am going to try to take a deep breath and accept the fact that I am doing the best that I can....  My teenager is taking on a little more of the responsibility.  Letting go, even a little bit, has been difficult. Teaching our children independence is what we parents strive for, right?? .... Although, with their health, independence, adds a different dimension to the equation.  As I go to sleep tonight, anticipating tomorrows Dr. appt...  I know, with confidence that I have put my greatest effort into getting a "good grade" on "report card day."   That is the best I have to offer...;)  I applaud all of the mom's out there putting their energy into keeping their children healthy...  Even if the A1C's aren't the greatest we should most certainly receive an A+ for effort!!!

The Things that People Say....

People try sometimes a little too hard to say the "right" things, with the intent, I suppose, to comfort.  Some words that I wish I could have forgotten have remained imprinted in my mind.  I remember one particular incident when Kalee was first diagnosed...  We were in the hospital and a nurse had come to take her blood.  She stuck her two times and was going in for a third when I told her "No more," and asked to please get someone else to try.... We have rights.. and no will advocate for a child like their parent.  She must have been insulted by my request and said with a smile on her face, "Well, with diabetes she will have to get used to needles."  I asked her to please leave the room...  When she left, I thought to myself, "Who would say something so insensitive in front of a six year old child?" I had no idea, at the time, that her words would be the first of many, "Things that people say," that cause me to question if people really consider the words that come out of their mouths.  I cannot count how often I have had to hear over the years, "God doesn't give us anything more than we can handle." Now, I am a very religious person, relying on my faith to get through any struggle that I am facing, but I have to tell you that no where in the bible have I ever found a passage saying that "God doesn't give us anything more than we can handle".... With each of our children's diagnosis I can say for sure that I felt that I was definitely dealing with much more than I could handle!  Another moment that comes to mind was a morning when I ran out to Target to get the essentials...  from laundry detergent to socks....  I just love Target.. it's a one stop shop!  While I was picking up some necessities I ran into a woman that I hadn't seen in quite some time.  When I asked how she and her family had been her response to me was this... "Well, I have good days and bad days but no matter how bad it gets I tell myself life could be worse it could be like yours with the sick children...."  Talk about dumb founded.  How was I suppose to respond to that? I felt like someone had just kicked me in the stomach.  I smiled and politely excused myself then left the shopping cart in the middle isle to run to my car and cry.... Over the years I have developed a thicker skin and now believe it or not I actually find some humor in the ridiculous things that people will say.  It is inevitable that as mom's with diabetic children we will have to hear many times comments like "Your child shouldn't be eating that."or...  "I knew someone who grew out of their diabetes."..  This is an all time favorite..  "My Great Grandfathers cousin got diabetes when he was seventy-five and had to takes a pill that helps him."  It used to frustrate me when people would make these remarks but over the years I have learned to grin and bear it.  Some people don't know what to say (so it would really be best to say nothing at all).  Some just do not have any knowledge about Type 1.  Take it in stride mom's.... (although this can be difficult) Look at the interesting writing material that can come from the ridiculous and sometimes insensitive..."Things That People Say..."   ;)

Parenting 101 ... :) No Perfect Recipe

All of the effort that we mom's put into keeping our children healthy...  by testing blood sugars  throughout the day (and the countless sleepless nights), counting carbohydrates in everything that they consume..., not to mention the "guesstimating"  on the foods which we are unsure of. Oops..., I almost forgot to bring up how we follow the kids around (when they are little) at birthday parties and family gatherings trying to keep track of what goes in their mouths as they graze on just about every food there is to be offered.  I remember the knots that I would get in my stomach when we would receive a birthday party invitation. Occasions that were meant to be fun can become some serious work for mom's of Type1 D children.  Somewhere between "tweenager to teenager"  some of the most responsible children may revert back to being six again, wanting their parents to take care of everything from testing all of the blood sugars, bolusing and carb.counting... Many of these tasks which they had been begun to take on for themselves suddenly stop completely.  Type1 is constant. The kids tell me all the time,  "It gets old mom"..  I get that..  I really do:(  Everyone needs a break sometime...  although with Type1 there seems to be no break.  We have experienced our own children wanting to take on their diabetes care all by themselves to wanting nothing at all to do with it.  When this first began happening it was very difficult to accept.  I had seen other parents struggle with this situation and I was one of those mom's that said..  "Not my daughter, not my son ...  that will not happen with them." Well parents....  guess what..  It happened, right in front of my eyes!  Thankfully, I am seeing signs of a turn around with wanting to take on more responsibility..  but there was a period of time that I had felt all of my effort in teaching the "in's" an "out's" of healthy diabetes care only went "in" one ear and "out" the other.  I have learned a great lesson through that experience....  No judging and no being a "know-it-all" in the world of diabetic parenting.  I applaud every one of you mom's that is walking though this and sometimes it takes all that we can do just to get through the day.  Please know that there is a mom out there backing you up and cheering you on without judgement...  ME!!  I have learned over the years that you need to do what works for your family.  It is not the same recipe for every household.  We try our best to teach our children (diabetic or non-diabetic) to be responsible adults.  As much as I would like to believe that they will take as good of care of themselves as I do of them.. the doubts do creep up on me from time to time.  I mean really ladies, you all know that we take much better care of our children than we do of ourselves.  There is a lesson to be learned here....  Kids model their parents...  maybe if we take a little more time in caring for our own selves our children will follow the same example...  I haven't exactly come close to perfecting this yet.  Just one more thing to add on my "to do" list of what I need to improve on!

Fall Photos of the Kids...

Macy's Award Night at school!



Kalee off to School Spirit Day!



Michael ready for a new soccer season!

The Lucky One....

As moms, we naturally worry about all of our children.  For the two with Type 1 my primary focus is their health, of course, along with the many other issues that go with parenting...but for my oldest, Macy (non-diabetic), I have different concerns..  She gets many comments from (well meaning) people, I'm sure. Her favorite by far is, "Oh, Your the Lucky One." You just have to love the things that people say. That in itself will be an entirely separate entry. Being the oldest child in a family where your two other siblings are Type 1 is not always easy. She and I can be engaging in a conversation about her day and my youngest will say..."I feel low," at which point everything stops and I must treat him immediately. Last night we were attending her honor awards ceremony at school and about fifteen minutes into the program my cell phone rang... The issue:  My daughter, Kalee,  had misplaced her omnipod (insulin device).   Now, we have lost our omnipods before....  LOTS AND LOTS of times, but tonight was about Macy (or at least it was supposed to be).  My first thought was to irrationally jump into the car and rush home to find it...  I needed to quickly regroup. Then whispered into my cell, "Keep looking."  While saying a silent prayer that it would turn up the phone rang again.  The pump had been found (under a backpack). Yay!..  Crisis over (for now). These things happen all of the time and of course at the worst possible moments.  I often worry that Macy's quality time with us gets interrupted a little more than it should.  She takes things in stride and I am grateful that she understands that some things are out of my control...  or at least she pretends too....  I am not so certain,  however, that she would always consider herself to be "The Lucky One" ;)

A Number Sets the Tone...

As much as we mom's try not to allow that first morning blood sugar set the tone for the day, it is difficult, at times,  not to. This morning both of the kids woke up with higher than "normal" blood sugars.  When I say "normal"  I mean "normal" for them.  Anything below a 140 would be ideal in my book....  however, in the world of Type 1 Diabetes that doesn't always happen.  We woke up to a 204 and a 190....  Yuck!!!  There was a time, however, when my kids were much younger that I would have been fine with a 190- for all of you mom's that have the little one's with Type 1.  I was happy to see anything below 200 when they were small.  It didn't matter how many times I got up in the middle of the night to fix the blood sugars while the kids slept they still woke up on the high side of the spectrum this morning..."Thanks a lot change of seasons causing our household colds":( that I am sure have contributed to the fluctuations. Although, quite often there is no rhyme or reason to the crazy blood sugars...  sometimes it is a pump which became kinked in the night (my kids are on the omnipod wireless insulin device) or simply the pasta and bread....   Mom (me) is Italian :) that they had for dinner which causes the blood sugars to be high. Then there are those dreaded middle of the night lows....   I am referring to those nights when the kids went to bed at a lovely 150 and at a 3 a.m check their blood sugar is 45....  This happens more with my daughter right now...  Soccer and running has a lot to do with that, as well as being a teenager and all of the hormone fluctuations.  Any parent of a child with Type 1 knows exactly what I am talking about.  The best advice that I can offer is to "treat and move on"  although much easier said than done.  For many years I beat myself up over the bad blood sugars.  Going over and over in my head what I could have done differently to prevent the highs and lows..  Truth is...  there is nothing that we can do to always prevent the highs and lows.  It is the name of the game in Type 1.  Trial and error.  What I do for them today may not work for them tomorrow.  Mom's out there....  go a little easier on yourselves.  We do the best we can.  There is no formula for a perfect blood sugar..... Although life would be much easier if there were!!  Try not to let that morning blood sugar set the tone for your day.....  unless, of course,  it is a good one!:)

Toddlers to Teenagers...

Raising young children with Type 1 is much different than raising teenagers with Type 1.  I have to be honest....  I definitely think that I was much better at it when my daughter was 6 rather than 14.  My son who is now 11 was diagnosed at age 9.  He is still in the "My mom knows everything about how to take care of me phase." :)  My daughter just began her freshman year of high school. She is so past the "My mom knows everything phase"...  Letting go has probably been one of my biggest struggles.  We went from a school where the nurses became like second mom's with three phone calls home each day touching base regarding blood sugars to Freshman year in a very large high school where she has decided that she would like the freedom to take care of her blood sugars independently... (still with a little help from mom.)  Instead of hearing her voice over the phone from school I get a text at lunch and before soccer practice with a simple blood sugar number and if I am really lucky I get a "Thnx.. Lv U" response.  I will take whatever <3 I can get right now.  My son, of course, is still full of the hugs for mom.  I have a feeling that the clock is ticking but I am going to cherish it while it lasts! 

Inspiration Behind the Blog...

My daughter, Macy, encouraged me to create a blog following an incident which took place on our family vacation in Walt Disney World... which, by the way, is our most favorite vacation spot:) We were having a quick lunch in the Magic Kingdom (some time after Space Mountain but before Buzz Light Year). A woman approached me asking if I happened to know how many carbohydrates were in the chicken nuggets on the kids menu. At first, I was taken back, wondering how she possibly knew that I was counting carbs in my head for the food that my children were eating. Then realizing quickly that I was holding their insulin pumps in my hand ( a dead give away for anyone who knows a thing or two about Type 1 Diabetes). I responded with the carbohydrate amount then went on to ask if she were a diabetic. She explained that she was vacationing with her daughter and six year old granddaughter who had been diagnosed a week earlier. Of course any of you mom's out there with diabetic children know the overwhelming grief that comes in that moment when you receive the diagnosis that your child has Type 1. When I heard the news of this six year old child my heart immediately went out to the family. As the little girl took her seat at the table with her mom I could over hear the childs grandmother telling her daughter and granddaughter that the woman (me) sitting at the next table had two diabetic children. I felt compelled to go talk with the child and her mom and as I began speaking... the beautiful little girl stared at me with a big smile on her face while her mother looked me in the eyes with tears running down her cheeks.  At that moment, I was brought back to eight years earlier when my own little girl, now 14, stared at me with her big beautiful smile wondering why the tears were running down my face as the Dr. explained her diagnosis and what it would mean for the rest of her life. I spoke with the mom, briefly, offering some basic information(trying not to be too overwhelming). We exchanged phone numbers and went our separate ways. Two weeks after that encounter I received a text from that mother thanking me for what I had done for her.... She said I was a silver lining in her cloud that day... . I wondered how I could have been her silver lining. I felt that I hadn't done enough. I wished, with all of heart that I could have done more for her. That encounter was the inspiration behind this blog. I hope that families dealing with the struggles of Type 1 Diabetes may see how we cope (and sometimes don't) with the issues that come along with raising children with this diagnosis. I would like to be an encouragement and most importantly put out there that we have days filled with laughter and silliness and sometimes tears and frustration. At the end of the day we are still a family like any other and our children want to be like every other child out there..... It has been a balancing act, which we still haven't quite figured out to perfection...... I don't know that we ever will, but we will certainly keep working on it!!! :)

Nice To Meet You!

Hi there.... My name is Mary (Brancatelli) Waddingham. I am married for 18 years to, Rick Waddingham ♥. I have three beautiful children, Macy-16, Kalee-14, and Michael-11. Two of my three children Kalee and Michael have Type 1 Diabetes... Thus the name "Waddingham's Wish" in hope for a cure someday.